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The other night I came across an “article”:http://www.engadget.com/entry/1488517862884828/ online via “Engadget”:http://www.engadget.com which then lead me to the “full article”:http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/12.08/play.html?pg=6 from “Wired Magazine”:http://www.wired.com. Ever since I have been on a geek kick looking up anything and everything related with cell phones. Some interesting articles I’ve come across in my indulgence have been an “article”:http://www.japanmediareview.com/japan/wireless/1047257047.php about teens in Japan who literally don’t know how to use PCs because they use their phone for everything PCs in America are used for — email and surfing the “web.” And I’ve found a “site”:http://www.juergenspecht.com/showcaseofjapanesekeitaiculture/ that has “showcases” of cell phone culture in Japan — from cell phone trade shows to people on the street using their _keitai_ (a word meaning “to carry in the hand” that the Japanese use to also mean “mobile phone”). I’ve even found a “site”:http://www.clayvision.com/cellphone.htm that sells the ever-so-popular-in-Japan cell phone charms. (I love the _boy masubi_ a traditionally dressed male rice ball. The rice ball is a Japanese symbol of friendship. “Good friends stick together forever.”)

Also in my online travels, I’ve found site after site (“this one”:http://www.thetravelinsider.info/roadwarriorcontent/nokiaunlocking.htm, for example) with information about unlocking your GSM(Global System for Mobile communication) phone to be used with other carriers. “One such site”:http://www.oreillynet.com/pub/wlg/3935 is about a personal account, with resource links. Following the links, and some brave key-pressing later, I now own an unlocked “Nokia 6800″:http://www.nokiausa.com/phones/6800 phone on the “AT&T Wireless”:http://www.attwireless.com network.

“What career will suit your personality?”:http://quiz.ivillage.co.uk/uk_work/tests/career.htm

You would be very happy in a career that utilised your level-headedness, and allowed you to work mainly on your own. You want a career that allows you to be creative, without having to be involved with lots of people. Some careers that would be perfect for you are:

* Artist
* Historian
* Banker
* Novelist
* University Professor
* Photographer
* Vet
* Paralegal
* Graphic Designer
* Online Content Developer
* Webmaster
* Producer
* Managing Director
* Nutritionist
* Advertising
* Nursing

You like working and being alone. You like to avoid attention at all costs. You tend to keep to yourself, and not interact much with the people around you. You enjoy spending time with a few a close friends. You like to listen to others, but don’t like sharing much about yourself. You are very quiet and private.

You are very practical, and only act after thinking things through. You don’t like being forced to answer quickly. You have to evaluate the situation completely. You make decisions based on what you can verify with your senses.

You like to be deeply involved in one or two special projects. You like to be behind the scenes. You are very logical and fair. You feel you should be honest with others and protect their feelings.

You trust your gut instincts. You are easily inspired and trust that inspiration. You are very innovative. You analyse things by looking at the big picture. You are concerned about how what you do affects others. You worry about your actions and the future. You tend to use a lot of metaphors and are very descriptive and colourful in your choice of language.

You are very creative, and get bored easily if you don’t get to express yourself. You like to learn new things. You don’t like the same old routine. You like to leave your options open.

I’ve been known to throw a tantrum when I was younger, as much as I hate to admit it. And I’ve also been known to obsess over things — right now it’s a new tablet pc. But I would never have done something like this kid did.

He _accidentally_ killed himself after his parents told him he had to earn a new cell phone that he wanted. Check out the full story “here”:http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2-2004350588,00.html.

Well, I’m not getting the Tax Specialist job at UnumProvident as I previously said in my last post. I totally jinxed myself.

I went to Manpower to take two of the three tests they wanted me to take. I took the teleskill (call center simulation) and the data entry (basic alpha-numeric data entry) tests. I scored above average on the data entry test, and I received “excellent” across the board for the teleskill test. The only test I didn’t take yesterday was the math test because that’s a UnumProvident-only test, so they’d have to administer that.

After getting home from taking the tests, I got a call from the Manpower@UnumProvident office to try and set up a time for the math test. During this phone call, I was asked again if the commitment to the 6-month assignment was okay with me. I said it was, but that I would really feel more comfortable with an Administrative Assistant position. Again, I was told that those positions are given only to people who have experience doing that kind of work. I know this is bullshit, so I called her on it, telling her I know people who’ve walked into Manpower and got a job as an Admin right away, at Unum nonetheless. She told me, “That was a while ago, things have probably changed since then.”

So, to sum it up, she decided that my commitment to the Tax Specialist assignment wasn’t what they wanted, and that they’d keep looking for admin-like positions for me. So, I don’t have the job. No income.

<rant>

I don’t know why they take themselves so seriously. As a “friend”:http://www.davethebad.com told me, they’re just a temp agency. I think they have an inflated self ego, and impose crazy limitations on people.

Get this — While I was taking my tests yesterday, I had to go through the Manpower orientation, which is just reading the manual, and signing papers stating that I understand everything. There was a guy sitting across the table from me — he wasn’t there when I first sat down, but his stuff was there. The guy took time in the middle of filling out his paperwork (which isn’t that much, and doesn’t take that long) to go outside and have a smoke. He reeked of cigarette smoke when he came in, and it seemed like he slathered on the cologne to try and cover up the smell. He also took his cell phone out of his holster, and proceeded to send SMS messages for a good 15 minutes. When someone came over to see if he was done, or if he needed help, he said he was just making sure he had all the phone numbers, and hid his phone from prying eyes. The way he was punching the keys on his Sony Ericsson T616, there’s no way he was just looking up phone numbers, that would use the joystick mostly. I just think that’s very unprofessional. I can’t believe someone like that will most likely get a job that I want, and he’ll probably take a break every 15 minutes to saunter outside to suck on a cigarette, and not do his job.

</rant>

So, I guess it’s back to plan B — applying for disability. I’m so surprised I actually called back the other day when I got the initial call from Manpower@Unum. I couldn’t call OfficeTeam back becuase I was just too scared. I took me at least 15 minutes to call Manpower back. And my heart was racing the entire time. Even when I went to the office yesterday, I was literally shaking I was so scared and nervous. Damn anxiety!

Today, while browsing “JobsInME.com”:http://www.jobsinme.com, I saw another listing by “ManPower”:http://www.manpower.com for an administrative assistant for “UnumProvident”:http://www.unumprovident.com. So, since they already have my resume and application, I sent them a little email saying that I would like to be considered for that job. All I got back was the same canned email reply I got last time when I emailed them to check up and see if they did receive my resume and all.

_hate_

But, later on today, I got a call from Manpower at UnumProvident. Of course, with my anxiety, I didn’t answer the phone, and when I checked the voicemail, they wanted me to call them back, no more, no less. So, I gather the courage to call them back, and I talk to the woman who called me. They say I can’t do the admin position because I don’t have any experience — how am I supposed to get experience, when no one will hire me because I don’t have the experience?!

Well, she thought I would be good for another job they have available. It’s customer service again, something I really don’t want to do. I dislike talking on the phone, and my social anxiety disorder has gotten worse. But I agreed to go finish the sign-up process at Manpower so they can see if I’m qualified for the job.

Now, the job, as I’ve said, is a customer service position. More accurately, it’s a “Tax Specialist.” Which means I’ll be taking calls from irate Unum customers who have had their tax returns impacted by the benefits they receive. I will have to do some math while on the job, and I’m not looking forward to that. I believe I can pass the “teleskill” portion of the test because of the first-quality customer service training I received from L.L.Bean.

So, I go to Manpower tomorrow to finish things up. I’m extremely nervous, and I’m wondering what I’ve gotten myself into. I think I’m gonna try and ask how I can be considered for an admin job.

A little more about the job. It’s temporary, but it’s a long-term assignment. It’s from August 1^st^ of this year til March 31^st^ of next year — 6-month assignment. And if I commit to it for the full term, there’s a completion bonus for all the hours I work in that time. Oh, and it’s full time, mostly 8am to 4:30pm, but some nights I may have to be flexible and work 11am til 8pm.

I just really don’t want to do customer service again. Sigh.

I’m reading Microserfs, and every main character has their own dream _Jeopardy!_ categories. I thought it would be neat to come up with my dream categories. So, here they are.

My 7 Dream _Jeopardy!_ Categories:

* Technology Acronyms
* _Trading Spaces_ television series
* Depression, Anxiety and other mental disorders
* SMS Messaging
* The movie _Hackers_
* Relationship-/Friendship-ruining 101
* _Star Trek_

I visited Serif the other day, and while I was there, Manhattan decided to be cute and cuddle with Serif. While cuddling, Manhattan proceeded to five Serif a small bath (or he was tasting Serif, I can’t really tell). It was so cute, and even cuter when Manhattan layed there after with his paw draped over Serif that I just had to get pictures.

“View the pictures here.”:http://blog.tduguay.com/images/galleries/manhattan_serif/index.html (Manhattan’s the black & white tuxedo cat in the background. Serif is the all black [but kind of black-on-black stripe] kitten in the foreground)

At times, I wish I had a camera phone just so I can take pictures of things I see that either annoy or delight me.

Today I saw a couple of signs that I would like to share.

* “Low Carb, Low Kal, Low Fat…” [sic]
* “Low carb power tools on sale.”

Today has been a pretty crappy day, if I do say so myself. I went to bed kinda late last night — 1:30am, but then I was wide awake at 7:00am. It seems when I don’t have much sleep, I get really irascible, feral — I just want to get away from – or kill – everyone who annoys me, and it seems like everyone I see annoys me.

Walking in to Wal*Mart today I almost got run over by a truck. I was walking from the parking lot to the entrance, across the cross-walk. He was stopped in his truck off to the side before I started across, but once I started to walk across, he seemed to think that was the time to speed up. He decided to stop once his driver side door was right in line with me. He had his window down, and I contemplated punching him. He just looked up at me, and I stared directly at him. No words were spoken, and he just drove off. I wish I had something ready to key his shiney truck, but I didn’t have anything. Now, he was so close to me that if I had been one step further along, he would have either hit me, or run over my foot. On further thought, maybe I should have just started hopping on one foot and yelling really loudly in public, and feigned the foot-running-over.

That didn’t help the feral feeling at all. I’m feeling a little better now, but hopefully a good night’s sleep will make things all better.

Have you ever gotten into a rut in your life that just brings you down? A rut that you want to get out of, but you’re not sure how to start. I’m in one of those ruts now. For a while now I’ve been wanting to get into better shape (i.e. lose weight), and just start being more brave (I can’t even call a store to find out their hours without spending an hour or two trying to work up the courage. I also can’t easily go to a store by myself and just look around, I have to have someone with me.). I also need to get a job, but that social anxiety is keeping me from getting out to the temp angencies that I want to go to, and applying for other jobs for fear that I’ll get an interview, and have to do something alone, and that’s terrifying to me.

I’ve been thinking about therapy/counseling lately, but I’m not sure what kind of help my insurance (state-provided) covers. And again, I’m too scared to try and find out on my own.

Another option I’ve been contemplating is possibly seeking disability for my depression an social anxiety disorder. But that seems like the “easy” way out and like I’m just being lazy. Which I’m not, but… sigh.

I’m just not sure what to do lately, and it’s really been getting me down.